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Fall Vice

Empty bag.
The deed is done.
My stomach is full.
Fall has begun.
See, in my head, the Fall season doesn’t truly begin until I OD on a bag of Brach’s Candy Corn. No other brand will do. Seriously, don’t talk to me about them. The other brands crumble in comparison (literally), while Brach’s has that soft center that just calls my name every October. The other chalky tasting brands are sold year round. That’s just wrong. Candy corn is strictly Fall. October. With a hint of November, IF you can find them in November. In my personal expeditions I have found that candy corn becomes scarce and endangered come November 1.
Driving under the influence of candy corn, or DUICC, began year’s ago when I would drive 30 minutes each way to teach private lessons. With my trusty bag of white, orange, and yellow goodness by my side, and a huge water bottle, I would listened to talk radio, and munch. And drink. And munch. And drink. As if the water was of any help against the sugar I was downing at great quantity and speed. Sure, I’d con myself into thinking that because they are sweetened with honey I was getting some tiny bit of nutritional value. Think again, Sherlock.
Upon reaching my destination I would think, “There is just no way I can eat any more!”, only to return to feeding my face on the drive home as well. The bag never entered the house, for then I would have to share. No, it remained in a specially designed hidden compartment just for candy.
While pregnant with Harper, or Zane, (it doesn’t really matter, as this story applies to both pregnancies), I recall hitting up every Walgreen’s from Evanston to Glencoe (there are 3 on Green Bay Road) in a frenzied search for just one bag of candy corn. Sometimes, to my dismay, the shelves were void of my yummy treat. Such a rare delicacy doesn’t remain on the shelf for long. I’m not the only seasonal addict out there.
I love the stuff so much that I even received a care package of a mixture of peanuts and candy corn from a girlfriend who moved away years ago when I lamented to her that the stores were bare. Apparently, Mississippi still had enough to go around.
All this to say. I’ve finished my car stash. I’ve snacked on a few handfuls at small group. I am now done. Satisfied.
And completely ill.
With the entire month of October to go. I hit the hard stuff way to early this year.
Well, until next year, my love. Parting is such sweet sorrow, but seriously, if you show your face around here again this season I will promptly throw up on you.
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